Sunday, June 21, 2015
The hardest thing for me is to accept a compliment. I can believe you see what you say you see, but I don't necessarily believe you see the real me. I am so quick to laugh it off or pass the compliment off as "God working in and through me" (which I do believe is the truth--any good thing you see, is God in me), that it sometimes seems (to me) that I am insulting the sincerity of the one giving the compliment.
But today was different. Today someone who has known me for a long time gave me a compliment. She knows me better than anyone else walking the planet today. She knows me well enough to know compliments are awkward for me. And I know her well enough to know she only speaks truth to me. Both things I want to hear and things I don't. So when she said what she did, I could say,"thank you" and nothing more. She still pointed out she wouldn't say it if it wasn't true. And though I have my doubts, I know I could accept that truth, because it came from her.
Not just because it came from her, but how. I know her well enough, I know her tones. I know when her sweet words aren't sincere. I know when they are. I know she knows a sincere compliment could be wasted on me, because she knows, I am not likely to believe it. She took a risk in being completely honest in her words... And I heard that in what she said, when she said it--and that gave me the ability to believe her.
Am I wonderful? Well, my knee jerk reaction would be to say "No. I just try to be obedient to a wonderful God and do what He says. So if you see me being wonderful, it's really just Him." And though that is true... As I think that answer. As I was ready to reply to her with that answer, I was reminded, that God in His Word clearly states that I was "fearfully and WONDERFULLY made". So, what could I say? All I could say was "Thank You."
I don't see me as wonderful. I try to be obedient. In that obedience I try to avail myself to do what He asks... And I fail. Every day.
But maybe, I am wonderful. Full of wonder? Absolutely! Cause others to wonder? No doubt about it! Made in the image of Him who is called Wonderful... Yup.
Arrived...no, far from it.
And all I can do, is praise the Lord for Who He is and who I am not, and who He is making me. Because who I was and who I am are two completely different people, and the difference is Him.
To God be the glory!!